Breath

That is what I need to remember to do. Is just breath. These last ten days have been very emotional. First it started with my husbands grandfather passing away on October 3. We knew that this was coming but it never makes it easier.

Then I received a phone call from my mom to tell me that my grandmother had fallen, hit her head and that her and my dad we heading to Kansas. When they got there it was bad. She had some major internal bleeding on her brain and had been taken from the Hutchinson Hospital to the Wichita hospital where she was in a coma and the bleeding was effecting her nervous system. Her children followed her living will and took her off of life support. She died 35 minutes later on October 9. This was Granddad Easy's wife and the last time I saw her was 18 months ago right before Granddad died. I am so glad that I called her on Oct. 1 (Granddad's Birthday) but was so looking forward to introducing Baby to her in March, which she was looking forward to also.

I am still getting Non Stress Tests (NST) twice a week. Well, today was one of those days. Normally they are thirty minutes and I am in and out. Not today! It did not surprise me that my blood pressure was elevated today (after everything that has happened). But Baby had a major decell that did go back up. As a precaution, he wanted me to go to the hospital to be monitored. He also wanted me to have blood drawn, which I normally have done there, but she was out for the day (and I also think he wanted the results sooner than what it would take them to get). So off to the hospital I went. I was monitored, Baby was moving like crazy again, blood pressure taken a few times, all normal, and labs done, all normal. I was taken to ultrasound for a BBP and Baby passed again and my fluids were normal. So I was discharged and sent home!

I was told to go the the Dr. on Monday (already scheduled) and to do the normal things. What happened? Not 100% sure but it is thought that Baby somehow pushed the umbilical cord up against the uterine wall for a brief moment. But I don't have to worry about counting the movements, can feel them all the time (especially my diaphragm and ribs). The ultrasound tech was also able to see hair (a little mullet!) and I told her that is one thing I am looking forward to, seeing what color Baby's hair is. She jokingly said red! I laughed and told her that would be 3 for 3 for red heads!

Just crazy weeks and it is still hot. Really hoping to be joining my husband, son and in laws next Friday for the Pumpkin Festival at the Botanical Gardens, 2009, 2008, and we also went in 2007 for the first time. I love this and so does Zane but we are really glad that Daddy will join us this year. I would also like to keep Baby inside for another 17 days (at least). Even if it is still pushing the 100 degree mark here.

Reminder...Many who read my blog know this but tomorrow (Oct. 15) is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. At 7 pm in your time zone light a candle for your baby(ies) that you lost. I know that this was very special for me last year and I will be doing it again. I light a candle for Micah, my friends two boys, and then one for all my other friends who have lost a baby.